Seeking Comfort
by snapple79
Summary: What happens when Andy turns up on Sam's door battered and bruised after something goes wrong while she's undercover?


This idea came about when I started thinking about a story where Sam and Andy see each other while she's still undercover between S3 and S4, but not repeating the whole conduct unbecoming scenario. This one-shot is what I came up with. :) Please leave a review and let me know what you think!

Disclaimer: I don't own Rookie Blue.

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**Seeking Comfort**

It had been a rough week for Andy. She had been undercover with Nick for three months and was feeling severely homesick. When she woke up earlier this week, all she wanted to do was go home, see her friends, see her dad. Nick helped her get over it; he rented a cheesy movie and they ordered in from what had become her favorite Thai restaurant down the street. But then a day later, their boss needed Nick to join three other guys to deal with a shipment stuck across the border in New York. Being in their cover apartment alone for the last two days brought back her homesickness.

She'd been excited about today though; Andy and three of her new co-workers had a full day of delivering shipments around the city planned. She wouldn't gain much intel that they didn't already have, but at least it would keep her from thinking about home too much. They were nearing the end of the deliveries, the sunset looming over the horizon, when a dozen members of a rival gang jumped them. There was nowhere for them to go and it was nearly impossible to fight back being so outnumbered. Even her police training didn't offer much help as she was torn from her seat in the van and thrown to the pavement. She'd managed to get up in between fists and feet punching and kicking her, but the third time she was thrown to the ground she stayed there, curled herself into a ball and prayed the beating would end. It did...eventually.

When it was over, she walked for blocks before finding herself sitting on a bench at a bus stop. Looking down at her blood-stained sweatshirt, she pulled it over her head and tossed it into a nearby garbage can. She shivered in the thin long-sleeved t-shirt she wore, but knew she'd draw less attention in it than the bloody sweatshirt. Taking three different buses through the city, she let her hair fall over her face, shielding the cuts and bruises covering her skin. When she got off the last bus, she walked five blocks until she realized where her feet had unconsciously taken her. Here, to his doorstep.

She didn't know what time it was, having lost track of how long she'd been crisscrossing the city since the attack. She didn't know if he'd be home or at work or The Penny, but she was here and she wasn't going to walk away now. She rapped her knuckles on the door and was just about to knock again when the door was pulled open and she stood face to face with the person she'd been missing for three months - even longer than that if she counted back to when he pushed her away.

"McNally?" Sam squeezed his eyes shut, thinking he was dreaming, before opening them to find her still standing there. It was when she tilted her head slightly and tried to force a smile that the street light cast a glow over her face and he saw the bruises. "Andy, what happened?" he asked, stepping over the threshold to wrap an arm around her shoulders and bring her inside.

She winced at the pressure he was putting on her shoulder and swallowed thickly. "Can I get some water?" she asked, suddenly realizing how thirsty she was from walking around the city in between bus rides.

Sam nodded and she followed him to the kitchen, standing silently behind him as he pulled a bottle from his fridge. He handed it to her and ushered her into his living room to sit on the couch. He watched as she fumbled with unscrewing the cap, her fingers covered with dirt and dried blood. He looked at the bruises scattered on her face, an eye that was likely going to be black and blue and swollen by morning, the cuts on her cheekbone, her split lip. He didn't see much blood on her shirt, just a bit along the neckline, and figured she'd changed; wondered what injuries the shirt covered up.

She downed half the bottle of water before coming up for air and Sam just watched, not wanting to spook her as she appeared so fragile. "What happened?" he asked softly.

Her eyes darted up to meet his, tears threatening to fall as the emotions from the whole week piled up on top of being attacked. "A rival gang jumped us." She picked at the label on the bottle, not sure whether she wanted him to ask more questions or shove her back out the door. Her allergy to silence won over. "I didn't know where to go. I didn't want to go home...to the cover apartment. I'm sorry."

"Where the hell was Collins during all this? He's supposed to have your back." That was the number one rule, on patrol or undercover, and he wanted to know why the army boy _let_ Andy get beaten to a pulp.

"He's in New York. He doesn't even know this happened. I...I should've called him. I didn't even think..." She didn't know what the hell she was doing. She didn't even think to notify her partner, her confidant, the one person who had her back undercover, about what happened. Instead, her first instincts were to violate every undercover rule and come here, to seek Sam's comfort.

Sam could see she was beating herself up - over what exactly, he wasn't sure, but figured it had to do with Nick. "Text him. Tell him something happened, that you're alright, you'll see him when he gets back. You can tell him details later," he told her, knowing if Nick heard anything through the grapevine, he'd be worried about his partner. He waited silently, watching her type out a quick text before pocketing her phone. "Now, are you going to tell me where it hurts?" he asked.

"It's fine. I'm fine," she said, shaking her head until she realized the motion made her dizzy. She closed her eyes, and didn't have any warning when Sam's warm hand came up to cup her cheek, his thumb grazing over one of the cuts.

"Mmhmm, fine. Oookay," he said sarcastically. "Stay here." He got up, disappearing down the hall before returning quickly with a bundle of items under his arm. Sitting back down next to Andy, he placed a first aid kit and large towel on the coffee table. "Can I?" he asked, holding a wet washcloth in his hand.

Andy nodded, her eyes expressing how tired and sad she was without saying a word. It broke him, seeing her like this. The sparkle in her eye, the happy glow she always carried were gone, and he knew it wasn't just because of today. He could tell this undercover job had been tough on her so far. He'd been there before, knew what it was like to have your limits pushed, what it was like to become someone else. He just hoped she'd be able to get her spirit back once it was all over.

He pressed the warm cloth against her cheek, wiping gently to remove the dirt and blood. He took his time cleaning off her face, trying to prevent any further pain. She sat there, ready to fall asleep, but kept her eyes open to watch his movements. She saw the care he was taking and the love that was in his eyes. Leaning into one of his touches, she hoped it conveyed what she couldn't say; how much she missed him. The way his eyes caught hers, she was pretty sure he understood. Sam wished he could take away her bruises, but had to settle for wiping the blood off and making sure her cuts didn't get infected. He handed her the large towel to dry her face while he rummaged through the first aid kit for some ointment that would help her cuts heal.

"This is going to be cold, and will probably sting," he warned after squirting some ointment on his index finger. As careful as he was, she still winced, a reaction to a combination of the cold cream and how much her entire face hurt.

"Were you made?" he asked, needing to know what, if any, danger she was in.

She shook her head. "No. If anything, getting beat up for the cause probably solidifies my standing with the organization," she said, trying to push out a laugh at the irony of it.

"You need to contact your handler? Anyone in the organization?" he asked, wondering if she needed to be anywhere or if anyone would be looking for her.

"No, we've got a scheduled meet-up in a few days. I don't see the need to worry him with this for nothing. And we called the boss from the scene...He's, uh, apparently going to take care of _things," _she replied. They both knew gang leaders never took well to their own being attacked and Sam took some solace in the fact the people who did this to Andy likely wouldn't live to see another 24 hours.

"Okay, let's see the rest of the bruises," he said.

Andy twisted the towel in her hands nervously. She could only imagine what the rest of her looked like and didn't want Sam to see. "What? No, it's f - "

"McNally, if you say 'it's fine' one more time, I'm throwing you out," he interrupted, only half kidding. He could never push her out of his house, but so help him, he wasn't letting her tell him she was okay after taking a beating. "Let me help you, Andy. You came to me. Let me help."

She let out a sigh, knowing he was right; consciously or not, she arrived on his doorstep for a reason. She winced as she tried to pull her top over her head, so Sam helped, removing it gingerly and tossing it behind him on the couch. He tried to hide the sharp intake of break at the sight of her - both the bruises and how thin she'd gotten - but failed. He had to restrain himself from going after whoever had done this to her, even if he didn't know exactly who that was. She tried to cover the bruises with her arms, but he simply pulled them away gently. Bruises covered most of her abdomen and back, all in varying shades of red and purple. Her arms were battered and bruised, as well as her left shoulder, which took the brunt of her weight when pushed to the ground. She should go to the hospital to get checked out, but he knew being undercover made that difficult, not to mention how much she hated hospitals.

Pretty familiar with being battered and bruised himself, especially after the Jamie Brennan debacle, Sam figured he could get a good idea of how bad her injuries were, without the need for a doctor.

"Think you have any broken ribs?" he asked as he pressed his fingers as gently as he could around her bruises.

She shook her head, the pain bringing tears to her eyes, but she knew he was trying to make sure she was okay. "Bruised, I think, but not broken."

"A hot shower can do wonders, soothe where it hurts," he suggested.

"The pain is...I don't think I can." Now that the adrenaline post-attack had worn off and she'd been sitting for a while, the pain was increasing, only made worse by how stiff she was getting.

Sam grabbed pain meds he had left over from the injuries inflicted by Brennan and handed one over, along with her water. "I can help...if you want me to."

She took the pill he offered, not even questioning what he was giving her, and nodded. He stood up, taking her hand in his as he did. He led her to his bathroom and she started undressing while he gathered some clean towels. It had been a while since he'd seen her like this, but she didn't have the energy to worry about that now. She stripped her jeans and socks off, tossing them into a ball on the floor.

It was only then that Sam saw her jeans had been ripped and she had gravel stuck in the skin on her shin. He sat her on the edge of the tub before retrieving the first aid kit from the other room. She was poking at the spot on her leg gingerly when he returned. He crouched down in front of her. "I didn't know I hurt my leg," she muttered as he used a wet washcloth to clean the area.

"Too much pain elsewhere," he said, talking from experience. He noticed most of the gravel had come off with the washcloth, but there were still some larger pieces stuck. He pulled tweezers out of the kit as he sat back on his legs and propped her foot on his thigh. "This is gonna hurt, but we gotta do it."

Andy nodded before closing her eyes and resting a hand on Sam's shoulder to steady herself for the pain. As he picked out the gravel piece by piece, the hand on his shoulder tightened, nails digging into his skin through his shirt. But she didn't make a sound; gritted her teeth and bore through the pain. When he was done, he tapped her leg gently. "All set."

She finished undressing as Sam started the water and waited for it to get hot. Sam's clothes soon found themselves in a pile next to Andy's and he pulled back the shower curtain for her. He helped her into the shower, noticing she was a little unsteady on her feet and decided he was going to need to get some food into her before he let her go. He didn't even want to think about letting her go; wanted to keep her here in his arms forever. Wanted to go back in time so he never let her out of his arms to begin with.

He stepped in the shower beside her, nudging her closer to the stream of hot water. He couldn't help but smile when a small moan escaped as the pounding water did its job. Andy closed her eyes and dipped her head back into the water. She'd forgotten how good his shower was, how the water pounded out, massaging her scalp and her muscles. Any shower was better than the crappy one in her undercover apartment, but Sam's shower was heaven.

Her months of undercover work had heightened her reflexes, causing her to flinch when she felt Sam's hands in her hair. She immediately relaxed as she felt him massaging shampoo - her shampoo - into her hair. She was momentarily shocked he'd kept it around - all those weeks after he'd broken up with her and all the months since she'd been gone. She let him wash her hair, his fingers weaving through her black locks, as she stood there just trying to keep herself upright. When he'd finished with that, she let him wash her body; too tired and too sore to care how pathetic she might look standing there helpless. And she missed him so much, she didn't want him to stop touching her. His touches weren't passionate, but were definitely more than friendly; they were loving.

When he was done, she slid her arms around his waist and rested her cheek against his chest, partly to prop herself up, partly to feel the warmth of his body. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "For leaving. For taking this assignment. For being stupid enough to get hurt."

"Shhh." He pulled her closer, one hand petting down her wet hair, the other pressed against the small of her back. "Don't be sorry...for any of it. Just come back to me when it's over."

"It's just...I begged him...then you poured your heart out...then he offered...I had to...I miss you..." Her words were interrupted by muffled dry sobs that pained every bruise on her abdomen.

"Hey, it's okay. You don't need to...right now...We'll talk when you get back." He kissed the top of her head. Her words and her arms wrapped around him filled the emptiness that formed in his heart the night she didn't show up at The Penny. It was enough to get him through the next however many weeks or months until she returned for good. He just needed her to return safe and sound.

They stayed like that for a while before getting out of the shower and drying off. Sam threw on some pajamas before wrapping Andy in his robe. He left her for a moment to toss her clothes in his washing machine and then brought her to his kitchen, sitting her in one of the chairs while he heated up some soup and grilled cheese for her.

She watched him move around the kitchen, preparing dinner for her like he had so many times before. She knew coming here was the best thing she could have done, even though it was risky. She couldn't be alone tonight after everything that happened today and over the last week. More importantly, _Sam_ was just what she needed tonight. The warmth of his embrace, the knowledge of what would make her feel better and how to handle situations like this. She knew they still needed to talk about everything that happened before, but was relieved he wasn't holding a grudge. It was the spark she'd need to get through the remaining weeks or months of her assignment.

When the food was ready, he placed it in front of her and sat down across from her with his own plate. "Everything going okay with the op, other than today?" he asked.

She took a bite of the sandwich, sighing contently as how delicious it was. She'd been living off so much takeout lately, she forgot what homemade food tasted like, even if it was just grilled cheese. "Yeah, we made headway pretty quick, but the operation is so big, we, uh, we still have a lot to do before it can be wrapped up," she replied.

He wasn't surprised; his instincts always told him she'd be great at undercover work. Despite her failed op as a hooker - and well, he wasn't all that disappointed _that's _the op she failed at - she was great at becoming someone else. It's why he trusted her to be Edie to his Gabe way back when she was still a rookie. "Good for you. Sounds like it's going well," he said, smiling proudly.

"Well, you know, learned from the best, so..." She smiled big at him, her first genuine smile of the night. "I mean, when you've got the guy who perfected Ernie the Zamboni driver teaching you, how could you go wrong?"

He shook his head at her teasing. He'd known the minute he admitted that to her, she'd never let him live it down. Truth be told, he didn't really want her to.

"So, what have I missed around here?" she asked.

"Well, uh, I might have a new position by the time you get back. I'm taking the detective's exam," he explained.

"Wow, that's great. I never knew..."

"Yeah, you know, it just seemed like a good thing to do." He let her make her own assumptions, not ready for the heavy discussion about all the reasons why he was making the change.

She let it go, asking a few more questions about her friends, listening as he gave her the highlights of what she'd been missing. Hearing about everyone was the food her soul needed to keep going.

"Want anymore?" he asked when she was done eating, cleaning every last crumb off the plate.

"No, I'm good. It was delicious. Thank you."

He was putting the dishes in the sink when he heard her chair scrape against the floor as she pushed back from the table. He turned around as she was standing up, leaning against the table for support. He knew she'd never make it back to her apartment tonight and he couldn't risk her life by driving her and someone seeing him and connecting her to a cop. Selfishly, he also didn't want her to leave. "You should stay here for the night. It's late and you shouldn't be out there walking alone. And we both know I can't give you door to door service."

"Okay," she said, not hesitating in the slightest.

He wrapped an arm around her back and helped her down the hall, toward his bedroom. He handed her one of his t-shirts and pajama pants before leaving her in there to change while he went and made sure all the lights were off and doors were locked. She changed out of the robe and into his clothes, and crawled into bed. She laid her head on his pillow and inhaled, the scent of Sam enveloping her. She wished she could wrap herself in the comfort of his scent when she left.

She was already halfway asleep when Sam came in, shut off the lights and climbed into bed next to her. He'd splashed cold water on his face before returning to his room, telling himself he could be content just knowing she was safe and sleeping next to him, that he didn't need to hold her or touch her tonight. He was about to remind himself of that when Andy scooted across the bed until she was curled up against him and her head was resting on his chest. "Is this...Is it okay?" she asked sleepily.

He pushed out a soft chuckle as his hand rubbed up and down her back. "Yeah, it's okay." It was more than okay. He'd dreamed about being able to do this again since he told her he loved her. He just didn't want to expect anything of tonight, when she was bruised and battered, physically and maybe emotionally.

She missed this, falling asleep in the comfort of his arms, knowing she was safe. For one night, her mind and body could rest; she didn't need to be on high alert for someone busting through the door of the cover apartment. She could sleep soundly, without worry that the recurring nightmare about her being made and her new boss wanting to kill her would invade her thoughts.

Seconds from laying her head down, she was in a deep sleep. Sam could tell from the way her breathing slowed and her face nuzzled into his chest. He traced patterns lightly on her back as she slept before his eyelids became heavy and sleep found him as well.

The next morning, after filling her with pancakes, eggs, bacon and - much to her dismay - grapefruit juice, they stood near his front door. Andy was back in her own freshly washed clothes, some select medical supplies tucked in her pockets. Sam was just insanely worried about her injuries and wanted to make sure she treated them. "Replace the bandage every day," he reminded her.

"I know. I'll be fine, Sam."

He grabbed one of his grey hoodies - her favorite - off a hook near the door and wrapped it around her. He waited until she slipped her arms through before zipping it up. "It's cold out there," he said, his voice low and quiet.

She gave him a small smile and sniffed, excited that she had something that smelled like him. She knew it would help her get through her homesick feeling, if and when it returned. "Thanks."

He tucked the rest of his pain pills into a pocket of the hoodie, placed in a plastic baggie instead of the prescription bottle with his name plastered all over it. If she needed to, she could claim buying the drugs off the street or stealing them. Her hand wrapped around his before it left the pocket and held it there. "Sam, I..." A million thoughts swirled around in her head, but none would come out.

Sam slipped out of her grasp, framing her face in his hands, and smiled, not worried about all that had remained unsaid. "Stay safe. I'll be waiting right here for you when you come back," he said, brushing a thumb across her cheek, mindful of her cuts and bruises.

She wrapped her arms around his neck, grimacing slightly in pain. "Gonna miss you," she said as she brought their faces closer together. She pressed her lips gently to his, having wanted to do this since she first walked through the door the night before. Sam slid his hands down her body to grip her waist lightly as he deepened the kiss.

It left Andy breathless and when she pulled back, he placed another quick kiss on the cut on her lip, as if it needed his touch to heal. "You'll be back soon," he said, even though neither of them knew how long this assignment would last.

"I should go," she said, glancing behind her at the door. "Before anyone starts to miss me."

"You need to go," he whispered, wishing she didn't have to.

He walked them the few steps to the door and opened it. She slowly unwrapped her arms from him, a thousand goodbyes coming from her eyes but her lips staying silent.

Beginning her walk back to the first of the buses she would take, Andy pulled the sleeves of the hoodie down over her hands and refused to look back. She knew if she did she might not be able to keep walking. Sam stared after her, each step she took taking her farther away until she was completely out of sight.

Hope filled them both as they knew, no matter how long the undercover assignment lasted, they had something to look forward to when she returned.

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The End.


End file.
